Reservation or Segregation!

Isn’t it gripping how tinniest of incidences can affect us so much. I was travelling in the metro that day and then, there commenced the debate of all time among some college students. Even I had many conversations with my friends on that subject. But that day in the metro I came to know the ground reality of RESERVATION and how far it’s been efficacious!

Jyotirao Phule pioneered reservation in India with HUNTER COMMISSION in 1882. Phule had a vision of a utopian society. He proposed the ideas of inter-dining, inter-caste marriages and mass education throughout his life. Apparently only reservation is stressed upon and rests are being unheeded.

Reservation was introduced with a vista to provide equal recognition to the marginalized groups. From HUNTER COMMISION to THE SACHAR COMMITTEE of 2003 there are many commissions and committees affiliated with reservation in India. The main motive of reservation was ensuring equality. But are we really creating an equal space with reservation?

I don’t repudiate that there had been tremendous struggle on the part of marginalized groups to attain this opportunity. But is that all they call for? Wasn’t their goal to have an equal recognition? Is reservation on the basis of castes not leading to segregation? Years back they were considered different by the so called “forward castes” and now too they aren’t on the equal ground. Not because they are lower castes but because they are the new privileged people now.

We began from annihilating inequality by reservation. Reservation resulted in segregation and again there’s no equal ground. We have arrived after so many years of struggle to from where we started. Believe it or not reservation on the basis of castes is actually making a new privileged class. I know all the supporters of reservation out there would detest me for writing this. But is that all you wished for? When we say equality, aren’t we referring to equal opportunities? I know there are ‘n’ numbers of people who are taking advantage of this system. Not every person belonging to marginalized groups is backward to compete with the mainstream. And not every person of forward castes is privileged enough. So are we really encouraging equality?

When it’s about equal representation and equal opportunities, then why not talk about reservation on the basis of economic conditions? Is it wrong to uplift the underprivileged? And does only caste determine which group is marginalized or privileged? I don’t think any of us is incompetent in any way. But some are privileged and others underprivileged. Equality is in standing on an equal ground, not in becoming privileged while playing the underprivileged card.

For me equality is not in giving certain privileges to certain group. It’s actually breaking off the very notion of privileged. Reservation should be there but not on the basis of castes but economic conditions. Why not provide equal opportunities to the underprivileged irrespective of their castes? The dream of Jyotirao Phule and Dr. B.R.Ambedkar was the upliftment of the downtrodden. In Slavery (1873), Jyotirao Phule asserted that “wherever I find downtrodden people, I will dine with them and reckon them as members of family and as brothers”. The definition of underprivileged should not be limited to lower castes only! Upliftment of the subjugated shouldn’t be on the basis of his/her caste.

End of the line

Reservation in most of the Indian states unlike Rajasthan (68%) is up to 50%. The underlying principal behind the whole reservation system was equal representation. And as a result poor people from the “forward castes” are actually becoming the new underprivileged. So truly we are doing nothing new. Any system can only be useful if it should be applied appropriately. Reservation should be there, but not on the basis of castes. It should be for the upliftment of the oppressed regardless of his/her caste. Reservation should be on the basis of economic conditions.

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She Is A Human Being Too

She has always been a mother, sister, wife, daughter, and so on. Whenever we have in mind 'woman' we proudly assert, she plays numerous roles. Did we ever come up with the idea that by performing all these roles, she has lost her individuality? Why she cannot have an untrammeled identity? Why she has to be perpetually a mother, sister, wife, daughter, and so on? Is she incapable of having her own identity? Why we pinpoint her as a female or a woman? Why we can’t merely put forward that she is a human being? This article questions the real identity of a woman. Like my other posts I don’t intend to maim anyone and this piece of work is down to the ground is based on my surveillance and views.

J.S.Smith ones said; “Women were taught from grass root level to control themselves”. This statement presents an impression that though we reckon her a Goddess, appreciates her for having different roles but somewhere we subjugate her true identity. She has never been told to behave like an autonomous human being. She has to be everlastingly just a mother, sister, wife, daughter, and so on. But the question is why she cannot have an identity of her own? And answer of this question lies in our credence, our mentality, and our rearing.

Like J.S.Smith, Simone de Beauvoir remarked “One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman.” She arrives in this world akin and it’s us who define her as a woman. She’s trained to act like a woman. We never empower her to have identity of her own. We never accept her as a human being but rather mold her into a category called 'woman' who is reckoned with flimsiness and not having intellect. By the example of Africa and some other parts of the world we can imagine how pathetic the state of a woman is. They are treated like animals. On the other hand in Amazon, women hold higher position over men. But why we can’t admire her as a human being? There’s no desideratum of superiority or inferiority. we just have to create a balance. We necessitate just equality.  Patriarchy takes up a humongous role in shaping her as a woman. It never allows her to have an equal place and that’s why she’s labeled woman, so that there can never be equality.

It is an old belief of Indians; “YATRA NARYASTU PUJYTE, RAMANTE TATRA DEVTA” (God lies there, where women are worshiped). We proudly mark her tantamount to Goddesses but modern historians, thinkers and philosophers point out that by associating women with Gods, we dis-articulate her from others and deny her status of a human being. We hold; “respect her because she a mother, daughter, wife, sister, and so on”. But why we are not affirming that “respect her because she’s a human being”?

The problem is that she’s ignorant of her actual identity. She has been framed to function only as a woman. And it’s us who have trained them to behave like a mother, sister, daughter, wife, and so on. Why she has to be taught how to cook, how to take care of children and bear children? Why she’s not given fortune of deciding by herself her acts? There’s a need to bring out the notion that she is not just a woman/female but she has a self-governing identity as well. She has to admit that she’s a human being too.

End of the Line

She is not merely a woman but she’s a human being too. Don’t rate her as a Goddess. Just accept her as a human being. Permit her an equal place. She does not deny her status of a mother, sister, daughter and wife but we mustn't deny her status of being a human too. There’s a necessity to understand that though she plays ample roles, she has an identity of her own. We have to alter our mentality towards her. She’s first a human being and then a woman, mother, daughter, sister, wife, and so on. Don’t respect her just because she’s a woman; respect her because she’s a human.

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Act or Accept

Every time I think of the state of women I note that they suffer each and every day all over the world. But when it comes to examine reasons behind these sufferings I have found two things i.e. first of all our society does not provide equal position to a woman as man possess and the second thing is women themselves don’t act if something awful happens to them in most of the cases.

In this article I’m going to address particularly women. Some of you may find it against women but in true sense it’s not against any woman. My intentions are not to highlight short comings of women but I only pine to convey that at least now it’s high time to react against everything which a woman finds intolerable.

Indian society holds that 'husband is God' for a wife. But when this God disrespects his wife what can we make of this so called God? For the sake of values and customs of society a woman agonizes every day. But somewhere a woman is accountable for her suffering too. I credence if you decide to repudiate something no one has the power to force you to do anything but you have to show that courage to rebuff. Whatever the situation is it’ll definitely change when you wish to change it. I think a woman should hold an attitude, “If you’ll give me one blow I’ll give you two”. For me it’s not violence when it’s in self-defense and I would rather call it intelligence.

We complain most of the time this and that happened to that woman but when it comes to lend a hand to her we simply affirm it is her personal matter, how can we say anything? Yes it’s her personal matter and if she doesn't have the courage to help herself no one can help her. But sometimes conditions are very toilsome and a woman needs support from her family and society so in that case it’s not only her personal business it’s our responsibility as well. If something bad is taking place in front of you then I don’t think you have to tolerate it.  Support women around you, may be your one step can save a life.

I would like to share an incident, once I was travelling in a local bus and a boy was repeatedly trying to make a girl feel uncomfortable and we all were aware of this thing. At last that girl shouted and everyone in the bus supported her. My purpose of sharing this incidence is that when that girl took a stand for herself only then others supported her. If you’ll not respect yourself no one will give you respect. That girl could have simply ignored this thing but running from problems is not the solution of anything. We should act accordingly and instead of ignoring we should face problems.

I hold when we accept anything without acting is a complete failure. I’m not in support of taking things as they come to us. No one has the power to create a new life on this earth but only a woman. She is a strong individual psychologically as well as physically. What she really needs is to just understand her strength. No one can defeat you if you're determined not to be defeated. Marilyn Vos Savant averred, Being defeated is only a temporary condition, giving up is what makes it permanent. Don’t give up, fight back. Respect yourself and start acting.

End of the Line

In the end I just wish to assert that either 'act' or 'accept'. If you find something disrespectful then don’t accept it; fight for your respect. Instead of complaining take a stand for yourself. Have faith in yourself. If you’ll not try to help yourself no one can help you. Respect yourself only then others will respect you. Every woman would love to see a new change and for that we have to act. So start acting and I know a woman is capable enough to face any problem. Just be confident and live your life on your own terms.      

  

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Communication gap between parents and kids

Our parents are our first teachers, we acquire lot of things from them and for parents their children are very special. In ancient times, parents used to bring up and guide their children at every stage of life. Grandparents used to recite stories for Grand children, mothers used to cook delicious food, fathers used to teach good lessons of life and so on. But now it seems completely different because our parents don’t have time for us and if our parents want to talk with us we are busy in our own world. And it’s leading to communication problem between parents and children. 

My intentions are not to hurt feelings of people but it’s just an attempt to draw your attention towards this sensitive issue. 

First of all there is generation gap between parents and children and because of this they find it difficult in adjusting. Parents expect that their children must have patience like they possess but new generation doesn't have that kind of patience which our parents possess and they hanker after things to happen as quick as possible. New generation sounds practical and their parents somewhere dissent in being practical all the time. Now children do not thirst for marriages but they feel satisfactory in live-in relationships but parents long for arrange marriages for their children. Children wish for late night parties but their parents do not concur on this. I understand that there is a gap in ideology of parents and children but if they both will seek their best they will definitely cope with this. Parents always desire that their children stay happy so for their happiness they should accept their children’s ideology, and if parents can do so many things for us so can’t we compromise with our late night parties or something else. 

Hectic life of today's time is making a colossal gap between parents and children. Parents work for the whole day and when they come home they just hope for rest so where is the time for communication. Jesse Jackson asserted, "your children need your presence more than your presents".  When children have time their parents are not available and if parents somehow manage time their children are engaged in school or college work. Because of extra workload of office, school and college, parents and children are now sensing a gap between them. 

Social networking sites are playing a stout role in making communication gap between parents and children. Now children spend their most of the time on social networking sites and they don’t even want their parents because their friends are becoming more important in their lives. My mother often complains that new generation is just concerned for their friends they don’t even talk with their parents. And somewhere i agree with her because now a days a child is solicitous for his/her friends. But it’s not the flaw of children because somewhere our parents are responsible for this situation because they don’t have time to listen to their child and children want someone who can communicate with them. If parents are ready to pay attention to their children then I don’t think we have to waste many hours on social networking sites.

Our parents crave for ideal children. My friend said to me once that, 'believe it or not, the worst thing to hear from your parents is I’m disappointed in you'. If your neighbor scores more than you, they will say look he/she is so good in studies, but you don’t pay attention towards your studies. If someone is good in any kind of activity they will say see how good he/she is, but you do nothing. And in fact because of all these things children feel separated from their parents because their parents don’t accept them the way they are. It leads to hiding things which generally children do because a child knows that their parents will not allow them to do so. But if parents accept their child the way he/she is then may be children and parents can come together.

All I can say is parents and children should understand each other only then the problem of communication gap between them can be solved.

End of the Line

I want to convey a short message that there should be a friendly relationship between parents and children. Parents and children must respect each other’s feelings. Just try to hear to each other and give time to each other. We should focus on our real friends i.e. our parents because they will never let us down whatever the situation is, so start talking with your parents. I know our thinking is very much different from our parents but if we’ll lend an ear to them they will definitely attend you one day. It’s a beautiful relation just nourish it and trust me you’ll feel marvelous. 

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Life has become a Race

I woke up in the morning and ran towards my bathroom. After being ready for college I requested my mother to give me my lunch and as always she said, "eat your breakfast". And I replied I’ll be late mom I have to reach on time. But while I was on my way to college I realized that I’m skipping everyday lot of things, whether its breakfast, my favorite movie, my stupid talks with my elder brother, outing with my friends and many more things. Like me everyone is making compromises in their lives. Everyone is just trying to reach somewhere and in the process of at arriving at that point we are losing beautiful moments of present. The way we are living our lives is really different from ancient times. Yeah you’ll say its competitive world and we have to sacrifice certain things for a good life. And I would say yes may be but for future why we are making our present a RACE?  In this article I’m going to put into words ideas on life that now has become a race.

Our life is a wonderful gift from God to us and in our own life we honestly don’t have much time for ourselves. We wish to score well in college or school, we want to make good presentations for office,  we desire for attaining same status and wealth that people around us possess, we become jealous as well and now we have lost our smile somewhere in the continuous struggle of life. That’s what our life is. I remember here a nice line by Thomas Fuller; he said "we are born crying, live complaining, and die disappointed". We do things and when result comes out we say oh it’s not that good. But we don’t even think for a second that in accomplishing this NOT SO GOOD what we have immolated.

I have seen people around me who always turn down to do their favorite things just because of studies, because of office or something else. I asked my friend to go out but she replied she’ll study for exams so she can’t come and I was surprised because she loves outings and there was whole one month left for preparation of exams. We always want to go on top and it doesn't matter what we have to give up at reaching that place.  If we’ll somehow manage to be on top but do you think we’ll be able to live these amazing moments of present again? No these present moments will be reminiscence of past in future.

In school or college we desire for  number one place no matter we genuinely want that place or not because most of the time we do things for our family, for our future, to show someone or something else. Our parents say if you’ll not score good then you’ll suffer in future but what about the present? Our parents work undoubtedly hard so that we can live a satisfied life but I maintain if my parents are with me and they are there to listen to me only then I’ll feel satisfied. I think for living a blithesome life we need love not materialistic things. I would like to share one incident, my neighbor was working really hard so that he can buy a diamond ring for his wife but when he gave that ring to his wife, she said she doesn't need these diamonds but she just wish for his time, she would be more happier if her husband would spend his most of the time with her.

We all are just taking part in a race and the funny thing is our motives are different but still we are in the same game. Some people want good jobs, some wish for fame, some desire comfort life in future and so on but that’s all we want from life? Some of you’ll say my philosophy will not help me in future and I’ll verbalize that I want to live each and every moment of life so I’m quitting this race.  Eleanor Roosevelt verbalized," the purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experiences". If we’ll always strive for a higher status, give more importance to materialistic things and always become a part of competition then we’ll miss rich experiences of life.

We see competition is everywhere, be it admissions or placement we have to just run for securing a place. From our first step to our last step we just run. No doubt if we want to survive we have to run but it’s our life and will we just run? No we must enjoy our lives the way we want to. I know now a day’s competition is very tough and for that we’re yielding up relationships, paying no heed towards our happiness and we are just transforming into a machine. But after doing everything honestly we don’t feel much felicity because we have wasted our present for future.

Life means our happiness and it can only be attained by living little moments of life. Long drives in rain with our loved ones, dancing on funny songs, starting morning with fresh flowers, having fun with our family and friends, reading our favorite books, following our passion  and so on; these are some things which can be little moments of life but trust me these will serve you immense happiness. No matter what our choices are but when we’ll forget about the rat race and focus on our lives we’ll find true purpose of life.

 End of the Line

Our life is an irredeemable gift given by God. We should taste it and experience it to utmost. Don’t bother what others have in their lives and don’t be jealous.  When we’ll be old then we’ll realize what we have missed because if we’ll be a part of race throughout our whole life then we’ll not have memories that can make us cry or laugh. Life is full of uncertain things, just go with the flow. When we do things without thinking so much only then we experience unexpected things. I know my words are sounding stupid but this stupidity is really good for living a happy life. So try to do everything which you want to do and trust me you’ll feel awesome and do tell me what you did for your happiness. Stay happy and keep experimenting in life.

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